In his perennial effort to trash God’s reputation on Earth, Pat Robertson blamed him for the heartrending devastation in Haiti by saying the Caribbean country was suffering from the pact they made with Ol’ Scratch.

Turns out, the Devil wasn’t so pleased himself with this (ostensibly, God will sort out Robertson at a later date). Thank you Lily Coyle of Minneapolis for your pitch-perfect piece in the Minneapolis Star-Tribune:

Dear Pat Robertson,

I know that you know that all press is good press, so I appreciate the shout-out. And you make God look like a big mean bully who kicks people when they are down, so I’m all over that action. But when you say that Haiti has made a pact with me, it is totally humiliating. I may be evil incarnate, but I’m no welcher.

The way you put it, making a deal with me leaves folks desperate and impoverished. Sure, in the afterlife, but when I strike bargains with people, they first get something here on earth — glamour, beauty, talent, wealth, fame, glory, a golden fiddle. Those Haitians have nothing, and I mean nothing. And that was before the earthquake.

Haven’t you seen “Crossroads”? Or “Damn Yankees”? If I had a thing going with Haiti, there’d be lots of banks, skyscrapers, SUVs, exclusive night clubs, Botox — that kind of thing. An 80 percent poverty rate is so not my style. Nothing against it — I’m just saying: Not how I roll.

You’re doing great work, Pat, and I don’t want to clip your wings — just, come on, you’re making me look bad. And not the good kind of bad. Keep blaming God. That’s working. But leave me out of it, please. Or we may need to renegotiate your own contract.

Best, Satan

I was flipping through Wikipedia when I hit the article Writings of D.M. Murdock. It stuck out.  It’s an odd title, and there is no Wikipedia article about D.M. Murdock herself.  Murdock, under her pen name Acharya S, had a biography for years; however, she has been at the heart of a controversy fundamental to Western civilization: was Jesus real?  If any topic can bring detractors, it’s the very suggestion of it.

According to her site, she has a degree in Classics from Franklin and Marshall College and attended the American School of Classical Studies at Athens.

Murdock/Acharya has to date written five scholarly books that argue Jesus Christ is a myth, beginning with The Christ Conspiracy: The Greatest Story Ever Sold. Subsequent books delve further into explaining how the story of Christ was recycled from other mythologies, and they address criticism about her or her research, which she stands by.

From Writings of D.M. Murdock:

Acharya describes the New Testament as a work of mythic fiction within a historical setting. The story of Christ, she maintains, is a retelling of various pagan myths, representing “astrotheology,” or the story of the Sun and also incorporates the science of archaeoastronomy. She asserts the pagans understood the stories to be myths, but Christians obliterated evidence to the contrary by destroying and controlling literature when they attained control of the Roman Empire, which led to widespread illiteracy in the ancient world, ensuring the mythical nature of Christ’s story was hidden.

She argues that the canonical gospels represent a middle to late 2nd-century CE creation utilizing Old Testament “prophetic” scriptures as a blueprint, in combination with a collage of other, older Pagan and Jewish concepts, and that Christianity was thereby fabricated in order to compete with the other popular religions of the time.

Murdock continues to write a column as Freethought Examiner.  Below are five questions for her.

Five Questions: Different people, same questions

Q. What is one thing you think every American should know?

A. Every American should know that they are protected by the greatest Constitution the world has so far created and that their freedoms must not be taken for granted but must be fought for. As American Founding Father Thomas Jefferson was reputed to say, “The price of liberty is eternal vigilance.”

Q. If you had the option to have been born another nationality than your current one, which nationality would you choose?

A. I have a big soft spot for ancient Greece, and I would have loved to have been active in the creation of the classical Greek civilization. It would have been amazing to be in ancient Egypt as well. As concerns modern countries, New Zealand would be lovely, I imagine. Everyone loves New Zealanders. I rather like India as well. There are many fascinating cultures and places on planet Earth.

Q. What is one misconception people have about you?

A. Many people think I am an atheist or anti-religious. I do not label myself either an atheist or a theist, and I have a tremendous appreciation for religion, so long as its meaning and origins are understood. Unfortunately, very few people are truly aware of the roots of religious ideology, so what we see manifested is often the pathology of religion, and that is all I am really criticizing. The rest of my work is designed to show the great beauty of human culture dating back thousands of years.

Q. Is there anyone’s death, either in your life or in popular culture, whose passing you were surprised by how profoundly it affected you?

A. The profundity of how my mother’s death affected me was not surprising. The most surprising sense of loss, probably, was over the death of Princess Diana. Although I liked what I knew about her before her death, I was under the false impression that she was somewhat shallow and superficial. It occurred to me after she was killed just how deep and caring a human being she was. Diana was extremely innocent and trusting; yet, she was also incredibly powerful and had been born into a world-changing role. Amazing woman, really. Her death was the end of the glamour age for royalty. I hoped that the massive globally mourning would have pulled people together, but it seems not at all. I hate to think that her life and death were for nothing. Ditto with my mom and every individual who has contributed light and love to planet Earth.

Q. In life we often have goals that we feel as if would just die if we don’t reach them. Sometimes we reach them, sometimes we don’t. The question is, have you ever worked to fulfill a goal, only to find that once you achieved it, the experience was a let down? It meant something to you when you did not have it. Then you obtained it and, after the initial excitement, you thought to yourself, “Is that all there is?” Have you ever had an experience like that?

A. LOL! Of course, I have had many disappointments in life. It’s an ongoing thing. We try not to be negative, so instead we set high hopes and positive wishes; yet, the reality frequently shortchanges our desired outcome. That’s how life is. Thus, in order to keep that zest for life alive, we must look to smaller pleasures for a sense of excitement and accomplishment, while relishing that occasional grand achievement we may be fortunate to attain.

“If you are doing business with a religious son-of-a-bitch GET IT IN WRITING. His word isn’t worth shit–not with the good Lord telling him how to fuck you on the deal.” — William S. Burroughs

The number of Americans who identify as Christian is 76 percent, down from 86% since 1990.  Thirty percent of married couples did not have a religious ceremony and more than one in four Americans will not be buried in a religious ceremony when they die.

These are the findings of the American Religious Identification Survey, conducted by researchers at Trinity College of Hartford, Connecticut.  These findings comport with a similar study conducted in 2007 by the Pew Forum on Religion & Public Life.  Partly the reason people do not identify with religion anymore is because of the hypocrisy of the evangelical movement over the decade.  As the United States tortured people held in our custody; detained prisoners with no access to a trial to discover their guilt or innocence; rejected any role as “custodian of the Earth” in regards to climate change; created a situation where Wall Street looted the American economy; and rejected scientific research and findings in favor of previously-held conclusions; it’s no wonder people feel less religious.   All of the policies of the last eight years were upheld by the evangelicals, who raised nary a whimper as everything that people believe it means to be an American was put through a shredder. 

Americans are waking up to many falsehoods:  that those who espouse religious values often do not follow them (e.g. Ted Haggard, et al.); that the market does not always do what is best; that our leaders will ditch our values if it helps them attain power (Dick Cheney, George Bush, Tom DeLay, et al.). 

So it’s interesting that Pope Benedict XVI, on a recent trip to Cameroon, once more provided an example of how Big Religion holds back human progress: in an area hit hardest by the AIDS crisis, the Pope told them that condoms actually exacerbate the problems of AIDS (emphasis added):

The pontiff, speaking to journalists on his flight, said the condition was “a tragedy that cannot be overcome by money alone, that cannot be overcome through the distribution of condoms, which even aggravates the problems”. [....]

“It is of great concern that the fabric of African life, its very source of hope and stability, is threatened by divorce, abortion, prostitution, human trafficking and a contraception mentality,” he added.

More than two-thirds – 67% – of the global total of 32.9 million people with HIV live in sub-Saharan Africa.

Three-quarters of all Aids deaths in 2007 happened there.

One has to wonder why anyone listens to the religious institutions anymore, when they clearly have an agenda that works against humanity.   That is one reason why people feel less religious.  Leonard Pitts, Jr. at the Seattle Times has his own theory:

What is the cumulative effect upon outside observers of Jim and Tammy Faye Bakker living like lords on the largesse of the poor, multiplied by Jimmy Swaggart’s pornography addiction, plus Eric Rudolph bombing Olympians and gays in the name of God, plus Muslims hijacking airplanes in the name of God, multiplied by the church that kicked out some members because they voted Democrat, divided by people caterwauling on courthouse steps as a rock bearing the Ten Commandments was removed, multiplied by the square root of Catholic priests preying on little boys while the church looked on and did nothing, multiplied by Muslims rioting over cartoons, plus the ongoing demonization of gay men and lesbians, divided by all those “traditional values” coalitions and “family values” councils that try to bully public schools into becoming worship houses, with morning prayers and science lessons from the book of Genesis? Then subtract selflessness, service, sacrifice, holiness and hope.

Do the math, and I bet you’ll draw the same conclusion the researchers did.